eshda3wa

April 28, 2009

Letting You Go




I haven't seen her in a while

her hair tied back in a ponytail

her cheeks sunken

black circles around her eyes from lack of sleep.

But that's part of every new mothers look.

I don't think she noticed me staring at her.

As soon as our eyes met i smiled, and we kissed and said our hellos like we saw each other last week. Instead of nine moths ago.

There we were in a near strangers house, acting like strangers ourselves.

Like we weren't nearly sisters. our past and history so entwined i dont have a memory that is just my own. She seems to be in every single on of them.

How did we get to this point?

i know exactly how. Down to the precise second that turned our relationship around.

there we were sitting next to each other yet worlds apart.

A big fat elephant between us.

neither of us wanting to acknowledge it.

Both of us wishing we could kill it.

But we won't.

We cant.

The damage is already too great.

So were going to smile at each other in public, and exchange pleasantries at gatherings.

But we would never again be what we once were.

I have let you go.

posted by eshda3wa at 12:00 AM

28 Comments:

made me sad =,c

April 28, 2009 at 12:06 AM  

I can relate to it very much!!!
Same heart breaking feeling going on with me every single day :((

April 28, 2009 at 12:40 AM  

Sometimes the only thing you can do is to let go. I think when the time comes to let go, whether you want to admit it to yourself or not, you feel it inside you, and usually it is better to listen to that gut feeling rather than try to resist it.

April 28, 2009 at 12:45 AM  

i hate when this happen, i hate it when people or i change without planning to, i hate when relationships change, it depresses me, especially when i know that i wont be able to change them back!

April 28, 2009 at 1:49 AM  

Marriage!! Supposed to build a relationship between a new couple whilst it damages a relationship between two friends who once upon a time were soulmates!! Tell me about it!

April 28, 2009 at 2:01 AM  

I dont know what happened and what is the reason. But, aren't you two suppose to save this friendship :)

April 28, 2009 at 4:35 AM  

wow .. that hit me!
exact exact same thing happened to me,.
i dont know what got the two of u apart .. but i mean my (e5it dinya) we were like this for two years ..
and i thought that wed never be like we were before ..

al7imdellah i was wrong :)
it worked out .. and were just like before if not closer ..

so never say never :* these things happen all the time.
best of luck

April 28, 2009 at 7:50 AM  

;(

April 28, 2009 at 7:53 AM  

I can see that this is hurting you. But never say never. You never know what the future hides and you might be back together like old days or even better. ;)

April 28, 2009 at 8:26 AM  

i hate it when things like this happenens.. sigh.. life!

April 28, 2009 at 8:34 AM  

*hugs*

you ain't only one out there, if you understand what am I saying.

April 28, 2009 at 8:43 AM  

It's really sad when friends grow apart. It happened to me too and the whole thing was very hurtful and disappointing. But you know what? So long as you can be pleasant to each other when you see each other in public there's still a small window open for fences to mend. Sometimes time needs to pass and you find yourself feeling different about the friend, a little less upset, a little more accepting.

April 28, 2009 at 8:59 AM  

:`(

April 28, 2009 at 12:38 PM  

You got talent :)

April 28, 2009 at 1:49 PM  

that hurts... so bad b3d..
n when she tries to be nice fj2a o bring back lost history.. its just too lame..

gbye frind :)

April 28, 2009 at 3:25 PM  

Seems very tough situation and its hard when you have to let go!

April 28, 2009 at 3:40 PM  

Bone-chilling, Eshda3wa. Very expressive. I always choose to cut them out of my life completely instead of talking to them over the huge wall between us. I don't like to downgrade any kind of relationship/friendship. If i had to, i'd demolish it. Very nonsensical.

April 28, 2009 at 3:48 PM  

Maybe just for now, Eshda3wa . . . maybe just now when your lives have taken you - maybe temporarily - in different directions.

All those memories are a powerful foundation for a long long term friendship. I have a friend who calls me her "battle buddy': we've been apart for a long time, but when I'm in big trouble, she's who I call. Sometimes she knows I'm in trouble before I do.

Don't think that it's over forever. Friendships forged over a long time have serious strength.

April 28, 2009 at 4:42 PM  

uffff, this feeling sucks!
brought tears to my eyes.

April 28, 2009 at 6:08 PM  

hatha akrah shu3oor bil dinya =(

April 28, 2009 at 7:28 PM  

this sucks :\

April 28, 2009 at 9:58 PM  

i know exactly how u feel...its sad :S

April 28, 2009 at 11:17 PM  

eshda3wa may9eer! you have to try! lama takbroon you'll regret it believe me.

April 29, 2009 at 1:20 AM  

the worst thing possible is to lose a beloved friend close to you =(

im sorry dude..

April 29, 2009 at 4:07 AM  

Deep is an understatemen.. Love the post

April 29, 2009 at 4:54 AM  

i hate it when that happens =\

April 29, 2009 at 5:58 PM  

awww =(

April 29, 2009 at 8:43 PM  

It's amazing how many of us go through something like that at some point.. especially women, i think,. I know the feeling..

very expressive i love the way you wrote it..

May 2, 2009 at 1:29 AM  

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